The Sugar Diaries

Inspired by my 71-year-old housemate, I have decided to go on what she calls a ‘regime’ and most other people call a ‘diet’.

Well, ok, look – it’s not really a diet. I’m giving up refined sugar for a few weeks. That’s all, really.

I could cite the trillion reasons why sugar is bad for you and all the documentaries, articles and books professing this, but I don’t need to. Let’s be honest, pure common sense tells you that sugar isn’t doing you any good. That’s most definitely not to say that sugar is inherently bad – how could cake be bad!? – but when you’ve been imbibing the white stuff in such huge proportions as I have… maybe it’s time to ease up a little bit. Indeed, my housemate only went on her ‘regime’ because she insisted that it was my encouragement of her baking that had made her gain a few kilos.

I’ve decided to do it in February because January is depressing enough as it is without also putting yourself through the torture (and, I expect, withdrawal) of giving up a substance that is allegedly more addictive than cocaine.

As for results – I’m not expecting anything, though some of the benefits that food gurus spout off about would be nice (better sleep, more energy, clearer skin, weight loss, better concentration, more stable mood, cures for all your ailments, finding the love of your life, reconciling with your parents, winning the lottery, you know the sort of thing).

DA RULEZ:

I will not be eating:

  • Anything with ‘sugar’ listed as an ingredient
  • Any white carbs (including bread, pasta, noodles and rice)
  • More than 2 pieces of fruit per day (definitely no smoothies)
  • Fizzy drinks of any kind (including the ‘diet’ ones)
  • Artificial sweeteners
  • Alcohol, except what is listed below…

I will be restricting* my consumption of:

  • Potato products (including chips, crisps and… well, potatoes)
  • Alcohol (only red wine and gin & slimline tonic allowed – in limited quantities)

*by ‘restricting’ I mean ‘trying not to have too much of’. How very scientific of me.

That’s about it, really. Apologies for this blog post being so short and to the point – it’s just that I don’t think talking about food and diet is all that interesting (by which I mean I think it’s one of the most dull things you can discuss, along with other people’s dreams), and the more fun part to read will be the bits where I suffer horrendously and hate my life. I know what you lot are like. Sadists.

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